The other issue I would like to discuss related to spanking is whether it is ok for religious leaders such as buddhist monks and pastors to hit children during Sundays school in order to discipline them. I may be wrong, but I don't think that it's appropriate for monks and pastors to discipline children by hitting them. Giving advice and scolding is more suitable. After all, a monk is not supposed to harm living creatures. Hitting a child would fall into this category, whether it is ultimately for the child's own good or not.
I guess, hitting/spanking/caning is a widely debated issue. In some countries, hitting your own child would bring the child protection services upon you and you could lose your child due to "child abuse".
At the end of the day, I guess it depends on individual parenting styles. There are lots of great people who have been brought up without a single whack! I guess it depends on the child as well. There are some really saintly kids. I guess I did not fall into that category but I am so glad that I was disciplined then! :)
Summary
- Is it ok to spank your kids in order to discipline them? - I think it's ok as long as you don't seriously hurt the kid.
- Is it ok to spank kids who are not your own? - Definitely not. It's not up to you to discipline other parents' offspring. If their kids are not well-behaved, don't let your kids associate with them. Never interfere with other parents' parenting styles.
- Is it ok for religious leaders to spank kids? - I don't think so.
- What about school teachers? - I guess it's ok, as long as the child is not seriously hurt or scarred. (Personally I was never spanked in school, it was not allowed, thank god!)
8 comments:
Spanking, questionable, but kids need to be disciplined. No question about that. Kids need to be taught to behave so that they do not create trouble, at least to others.
On monks (I don't know about pastors) hitting kids to discipline them; there's no question. It's not in accordance with their vinaya precepts.
I do agree, but I cant bring myself to, sometimes. also sometimes when parents are under a lot of pressure and they get used to it, it may become a spiral which leads to a lot of regret.But to totally rule it out is silly because there are some instances where you have to show a kid that you will JUST NOT tolerate something.
"religious leaders to spank kids"
That sounds awful!!!
No wonder people want to exterminate each other in Sri Lanka.
The problem with some parents is that they don't really know the different between spanking and beating their kids shitless sometimes. When a child does something wrong, its not right to hit them out of anger - you need to remember why you're doing it in the first place - to correct and discipline. I consider myself an abused child because I was beaten so many times growing up with belts, stell dress hangers and anything my parents could get a hold of at the time. I didn't turn out to be a disciplined child - I was a wild one as a result because I tried my best to defy them as much as possible. That was my outlet.
I guess it needs to be taken up on a case by case basis and not a generalized manner.
I have to agree with themissingsandwitch here. You cant generalize it. And while some kids may not give a hoot about getting a few whacks every day, you could scar a sensitive one for life with a little slap.Ive seen psychological punishment work far more effectively than a spanking.
(Actually in school, I've seen friends come back from a "capital" punishment and getting treated like a hero for braving it. Kind of negates the purpose of the beating don't you think?)
I personally would never hit a child, and I don't approve of it either. There are better ways for discipline.
Priests and Teachers?? I don't see the problem. If you approve of parents spanking children because they care for them, doesn't the same apply to teachers and priests who care about the child too?
(If you're going to say they don't care as much as the parents.... Well it doesn't matter if they're priest or parent if they hit a kid for the wrong reasons, does it?)
My Moms a primary school teacher and some parents actually come and tell her to beat the crap out of their kids if they don't behave. (Nutcases if you ask me)Mom never does it. She's got some quiet stare+verbal assault thing that works. I know, cos it works on me :) Need to learn it from her.....
And no, I've never been physically punished at home.A few minor stuff at school though and I dont have any kind of arrest record. :)
Dili,
I felt priests are supposed to at least outwardly be a reflection of what they preach so I was quite shocked. So if they hit children, that makes it difficult to tell other people not to.
L:
I'm not saying priests should spank kids. You've gotten the wrong end of the stick.
I've said I'm against ANYONE spanking a kid. What I wanted to say was if anyone says its ok for parents to spank kids, they shouldn't single out priests and teachers and blast them for spanking kids.
Spanking is never a good thing as far as Im concerned
Dili,
Chill....I understood that you were not saying priests should spank kids. :)
Personaly, Im also averse to the idea of spanking kids by anyone.
Just thought I would point out that if priests spank kids openly, then it looks like its going to be difficult to advise people not. They kind of set the standard for society.
That phrase "wrong end of the stick" is so sri lankan. :)
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